Rebuilding Trust
There is good news.
This is part of a series, sharing the self-authored book, “The Hard Way: Honest Conversations about mental health in our homes, churches and communities,” which is introduced in this free post as well as this one.
The funds given by paid subscribers for this post will be donated to the 988 HelpLine.
Let’s start with some good news:
I saw this after I posted last week’s article and thought, what good timing as we wrap up this section of “The Hard Way.” Thanks to paid subscriptions, I will donate $219.62 to the 988 Helpline!
The final piece in this section of “What No One Can Prepare You For” will lead us into part three of this book: about how to create safe spaces in our homes, churches and community, so more people can know they are not alone.
After Jack hit rock bottom, I felt raw from intense conversations and deep emotions. I had relief, but I also feared that more attempts might occur.
For a few years after that episode, I checked each evening if he had taken his meds, even though he has a daily alarm and routine. I was thankful he didn’t roll his eyes or sigh (at least not that I saw) and that the fear dwindled each week as the trust was built back up.
It takes time, patience and lots of conversation to rebuild the trust, and decrease the worry that an attempt is still possible.
“As a strengthened ally, you will always have a worry deep in the back of your mind, ‘Could this happen again? Am I prepared to deal with it? Are we?’ But the greatest source of comfort is the knowledge that if you’ve gotten through it once, you can get through it again.”
(Solomon, The Noonday Demon, Scribner Classics, 2015)
Depression isn’t something to be cured, but it can be managed and it is possible to live with it. As our journey through it continues, I am thankful for the storms, because the dark clouds always move on.
Even still, this world requires us to be put together when we are outside the comfort of our homes. At work, I have to be OK, even when I’m not. Where is the space (beyond the privacy of my home) for me not to be OK?
